That they discourage attachment to objects in the physical world in order to diminish ones own suffering, therefore meaning that having friends and/or a lover would be a bad thing, as they are transient and will not last?
Isn't this a selfish view of things?
@ 2 hearts 1 passion - No, it states that things which are not permanent - meaning other people also - are like attachments too.
it's like, if your dad became sick, you'd be sad that your dad was sick, so he'd bring you suffering.
if your dad died, you'd be sad he died, so his death would bring you suffering.
no dad, no sickness/death, no suffering for you.
you could say it's selfish, but then again, getting rid of suffering is a way to nirvana.
That's false. The Buddha himself said in regards to the Noble life that friendship is the greatest. You don't have to be possessive or clingy in order to have friends or loved ones. It's that possessiveness that leads to suffering. There is a certain amount of suffering involved with love and friendship, but it's not an excuse to shy away from friends and love.
EDIT--Buddhism teaches balance. It teaches the middle way approach. Neither pathological avoidance nor selfish indulgence leads you to freedom from suffering and stress. There is a certain about of suffering that exists simply by virtue of being alive. You will lose loved ones to death or separation. Those are the primary darts of life that we cannot avoid. It's the pain that we heap on ourselves that we are working to avoid.
EDIT--Juan: The reason Christians are "persecuted" in Sri Lanka is their aggressive proselytizing of Buddhists, often in their own temples. How would you like it if Muslims went into your church and tried to convert you? If you are like any other human being, you would be extremely offended at other people abusing your place of worship.
While there is no justification at all in Buddhism for violence, the Christians aren't helping things any with unethical, dishonest, and inflammatory conversion tactics.
Uh, no. Buddhism calls for dis-attachment to OBJECTS. People are not OBJECTS.
Objects that cause selfish feelings, like desire for money or jewelry or other material crap. Not people...
You don't yet understand the concept of attachment
All is impermanent, therefore attachment causes suffering when loss or thoughts of loss occur. That which you own, owns you equally
All beings, even Buddhas, have needs and attachments. It's part of being human. but the trick is keeping your desires small and manageable. Great desires for many things is a recipe for suffering.
But truth be told, most monks and priest in my sect are married. It's normal. To go of on a tangent of giving all attachments leads into pure idealism, and that is not the path of Buddhism, we practice the middle way between idealism and materialism
I think that it has more to do with actually CONTROLLING the attachments you may have then just discarding them. If you have control over emotions and things then in a sense, you are free. Nirvana is when you have no addictions, when you don't NEED something to be alive.
Not really You can't have it both ways
The Buddhist path when followed correctly enables a practitioner to hack it out of these endless cycles of birth and death [ Samara ] but if one is not careful a person can be held back by love attachment and waste not only a life times cultivation but also an extraordinary opportunity Believe it or not It is very rare to happen on the Dhamma Sooo choices have to be made
It may to non Buddhists look selfish but it's not really It would be selfish to stuff it up for a practitioner by entrapment though You understand
I'm not sure why you have an interest in Buddhism, but in time you will likely begin to see that it's not so different than other religions in some important ways. Although most religions, including Buddhism embrace peace as a part of their belief, when 'push comes to shove' the mainstream religions do what it takes to protect what's theirs. Muslim, 'Christian', Jewish, Hindu, and yes Buddhists use violence to accomplish their means.
Just look at what has happened in Sri Lanka where Buddhists persecute Christians and Muslims. That's right, Buddhists have militias.
If You are looking for a peaceful way of life, why not consider the real teachings of God's Son, Jesus Christ. Not what you find in the big mainstream churches (they also have militias and get involved in conflict). At John 13:35 Jesus said "By this all will know that YOU are my disciples, if YOU have love among yourselves.?
This Love has not been found in big religion. Baptists killing Baptists in the civil war. Catholics and Protestants killing other Catholics and Protestants in Wolrd Wars 1&2. The 1857 mountain meadows massacre, where Mormons killed over 100 innocent people. These are some examples.
You will know the truth when You see people of all back rounds, races, cultures, and nations getting along in Love.
John 17:3 says "This means eternal life, taking in knowledge of You, the True God, AND of the one whom You sent, Jesus Christ.
Pray for help in finding the truth, and in really getting to know God and Jesus.
?By this all will know that YOU are my disciples, if YOU have love among yourselves.?
No, that is not correct. But don't worry ... it takes years to start to actually start to understand Buddhism, and those who haven't really looked into it often make the same mistake you do. Buddhism is not learned through reading or through study, but through meditating and following the practices ... knowledge, in Buddhism, is found through the experience of living and specifically through living the Practice.
You cannot "discourage" attachment about things that you like. To try to pretend that you don't like or want these things is only to live in a state of denial. You would have to close yourself off to your true feelings. Buddhism is not about denial nor about closing off.
At the core of it all, we all want only those things that make us feel good. But we do not realize how subjective this is ... look at how hard athletes train to break through the "wall", even though physically it is quite painful. But they don't see it as a negative to be avoided, do they? Their prospective on this pain is quite different.
The practices of Buddhism are another way of changing our perceptions of pain and suffering. We are all attached to this idea of wanting some certainty in our life, of ensuring that the "good things" continue to come, that the "bad things" stay away. That we will wake up tomorrow morning and find that the roof is still on top of our house, that when we go to stretch, our arms still work. We search constantly for permanence and certainty, on physical levels, but also on mental and emotional levels. We set up certain views and attitudes and defend them as being the "Truth" (some people will even die for them). And we defend our emotional stances just as strongly. In fact, just about everything that we do is geared to preserving the status quot and providing certainty. Even "thrill-seekers" are seeking to preserve their self-image of themselves as "one who dares. We hold on for dear life to the certainty of that which ... is actually impermanent.
The practices of Buddhism are designed to gently pry our fingers open, to let go, to experience life as it actually is, without all the trappings of self, permanence, certainty. To live live fully and openly in all its richness. And when you start to do that ... well just as you no longer play with some of the toys that were your favorites when you were very young, in the same way, you find that what you used to value so strongly no longer has the same "hold" on you.
But Buddhism is not a journey into selfishness. Part of the practice of Buddhism is to learn to value all beings, not just those who you have a personal investment in such as friends, family and lovers. And to find love and compassion in your heart, to do all that you can to address the needs of whoever you encounter. This is the heart of Buddhism, and it is hardly selfish. In return, the more you care about others, the less self-absorbed you are and the less "entrapped" you are by your own self and by your own selfish needs, attachments, and aversions. These just matter less and less over time.
In this way, by opening up to all that happens, both within ourselves and outside of ourselves, and opening to it all with curiosity and without judgment or clinging, we learn to live our lives with a richness and gentleness that frees us from suffering.
it's not in physical world - attachment is about psychological world. only in mental world, you can realize about your attachment - how it is, what it does, and how we are affected.
We must forget, but must remember with gratification. Have friends who have virtues.
Association with the good ones, the virtuous ones, it is very beneficial. The Buddha Himself said a good friend like Himself can give all the benefit to those call him a friend.
This story explains all:
One day Ananda, who had been thinking deeply about things for a while, turned to the Buddha and exclaimed:
"Lord, I've been thinking- spiritual friendship is at least half of the spiritual life!"
The Buddha replied: "Say not so, Ananda, say not so. Spiritual friendship is the whole of the spiritual life!"
Samyutta Nikaya, Verse 2
http://viewonbuddhism.org/resources/buddhist_quotes.html
http://www.wisdom-books.com/ProductExtract.asp?PID=1871
In terms of parents, Parents are counted among the Three Jewels in a particularly way. You may not attach to anything but remember how they were good on you (your virtue) - instead how they were bad on you (your ego).
http://www.familybuddhism.com/mindful_relationships.php
Would this be correct about Buddhism?
