Why does Hinduism use paradoxical language when talking about God?

How is God paradoxical?
I am not referring to a sect but an ancient text, the Upanisads.

God is paradoxical.

Intelligent beings can only be made by an intelligent being...

See what I mean.

Nothing makes more sense than a paradoxical explanation of a self contradictory claim. The attributes usually attached to the monotheistic deities invented these days are nearly all mutually exclusive.

Cause if they didn't people would figure out its bull shit

What kinda Hinduism are u referring to? The Hinduism I know of speaks about the Universe in a very clear, easy to understand way. Specify the sect u r referring to pals.

Because god, like everything else that is imagined, cannot be defined. Only something that is real can be defined.

The Vedas are very complex and the Hinduism make it worse. There are many different authors of different Upanishads, and they present their interpretations. Besides, Vedic knowledge is very complex and require a truly advanced realized soul to explain it. Therefore the first instruction in spiritual life(no Hinduism, the word Hinduism doesn't exist in the ancient Vedic Sanskrit text) is to have or accept a Guru, spiritual master, in order to explain the right meaning of the texts. Also there were a great Acaryas(great spiritual teachers)who left a great work explaining the real meaning of the Vedas and upraised, especially the Vedanta Sutra, like Ramanuja, Madhva, Baladeva Vidyabhusana and specially Krishna Dvipayana Vyasa. They have offered numerous alternative explanations according to a systematic study of the Upanisads and other srutis.
The subtle words of the Upanisads often mislead impersonalists into believing that all existence is ineffably one, without any variety in the ultimate issue. Some Upanisadic mantras emphasize the sameness of God and His creation, while others speak about their difference. Tat tvam asi ("You are that), for example, is an abheda-vakya, a mantra affirming that all things are one with God, being His dependent expansions. By the influence of the Supreme Lord's bewildering Maya(illusion), envious impersonalists read the abheda-vakyas literally and accept the bheda-vakyas only in a figurative way. Authoritative Vaishnava commentators, on the other hand, carefully reconcile the apparent contradictions in accordance with the interpretive principles of Vedic conclusions of Vedanta.
There are 108 accepted Upanisads by the acaryas, of which eleven are the most important: Isha, Kena, Katha, Prasna, Mundaka, Mandukya, Taittiriya, Aitareya, Chandogya, Brhad-aranyaka and Svetasvatara. In all of this describe the trascendetal qualities of the Absolute Truth.
Bhagavad-gita is also known as Gitopanisad. It is the essence of Vedic knowledge and one of the most important Upanisads in Vedic literature. Read this great book and everything will be cristal clear for you. http://vedabase.net/bg/